pet peeves and faith

(Pet peeves and faith. That sounds like an interesting connection. Let's see how she pulls this one off...)

I would say, on the whole, that I am a pretty easy-going sort of person. Not that I always have been, of course, but honestly there are only a few things that really bother me. One of them is the utterly despicable word thigh. I don't know what it is about this word that makes me gag if it comes out of my mouth, makes me wince if I am forced to read it, and makes me abhor it from the very depths of my soul, but there it is. That word is an absolute disgrace to the English language, in my opinion. (shudder)

Another thing I don't like is when people say that there are no words to express what they are feeling, but then still insist upon using words (that they have just declared do not exist, mind you) to describe something that (as they have just stated) utterly defies description. Now, since that irks me a bit, I won't do that. However, I will say that I have never heard anyone adequately describe what I want to describe, so I will have to take the blandness of my vocabulary to new levels of absurdity. Or I could just stick to bland and let you create the rest. That might work too.

Yesterday I was able to spend my whole day with my parents after nearly three months of separation. That is a long time. Yesterday was aMaZINg! The highlight of my day was probably a decidedly unique mini-golfing excursion. Because it has been raining solidly for nearly a week, we took advantage of the sun to find... a waterlogged mini-golf course. Every low spot in the course was now completely underwater, sometimes even the hole was totally submerged in a large puddle. We call this: extreme mini-golf. We call this: an amphibian golfing challenge. We call this: an hour of so much laughter and so many surprises that it was absolutely insane.
After the last two games of my first college volleyball season, and after saying goodbye to my parents, it was time for the trip back to campus. As I laughed with my utterly hilarious coach and listened to the music from his ipod, I thought that my day could not possibly get any better. And then, what song should play next but the "Sadie Hawkins Dance"? I cannot explain that feeling of total happiness and blessedness and the sense of everything being right with the world. I could have laughed, I could have cried. It is just the weirdest and most awesome feeling ever. This crazy experience is not unfamiliar, however. I have felt this way multiple times while here at college. At first, I was at a total loss as to why I kept feeling so happy. And then I slowly began to realize... it's a God thing.

Lately I have sort of stepped into a new phase of my spiritual journey. I didn't ever think about how much being on my own would impact my spiritual life. But now I am totally responsible for my faith. Yes, my parents check on me and make sure I am going to church, but ultimately it is up to me whether or not I go to church every Sunday, and it is definitely up to me whether I become an active part of my church or simply warm a pew every Sunday morning. My parents don't check to make sure that I am reading my Bible daily, they don't begin a conversation with, "Sooo... what spiritual truth have you learned lately? Explain." I am finally at a point where I have to be largely responsible for the managing my own faith. I am now doubly an individual as I stand before Jesus and his cross.

In the past few months, God has brought me to a series of hard choices. On the one hand, I can do what I think will be the most rewarding, or what my culture smiles upon. But on the other hand is the narrow and difficult path to which my faith calls me. Now it is up to me to stay strong in my faith. I have surrounded myself with godly support, but I still ultimately make the decision to do what God says, or to do what I want. I have really not enjoyed making the hard choice to follow God's will rather than my own, but I have let go or made changes in total faith that when I follow God's will, it will lead me to the place of God's blessing. I think that now I am beginning to experience the richness of that blessing. I am walking with God. When that happens, I am blessed even more, and because I am working to keep God is at the center of everything, I am able to appreciate my many blessings so much more fully, in the way that they are supposed to be appreciated. It is pretty much something that can't be explained in words. (!)

That was really a failure of vocabulary and ability. Most of you won't understand the Sadie-Hawkins-Dance-induced-euphoria. I probably should have used a different example. All I can say is, I tried. =)
Honestly though, how can the very great riches and blessings of an even greater God be described in human (especially freshman-in-college-category-of-human) terms? They can't. Just look at the Bible. Words do fail you when it comes to God's joy and peace. I think I should stop here before I just dig myself into a deeper hole and cascades of inadequate words leap down on top of me. Oh, and PS, I think I deserve a bit of a break. I've been filling out college applications and writing application essays all day. My writing abilities are about to give up the ghost. =)